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• Artiste: David Wilcox
• Titre: Rudolph Rap
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You've heard Dasher and Dancer and Comet and Blitzen... Do you recall the most famous reindeer of all? You can call me Rudy, I don't mind You can tell me from the others by the way my nose shines It was a point of contention, an embarrassment How was I to know it would be heaven-sent? I was chillin' on my own at the top of the world The North Pole joint, with the fat boy Kris Steps up to this fly rein-girl She says, “Yo, homeboy, you better listen to this: Anyone can see you got an interest in me I can truly understand it; I'm as def as can be From my bad Bambi tail to my hot hoof feet I'm the sweetest little reindeer that you ever gonna meet But you got a little nightlight at the end of your face Every time you get excited, you illuminate the place. Can't be your girl – ain't no way – I don't hang with no boy who ain't pulling the sleigh So beat feet. Scram. You hear what I'm sayin'? Shiny-nosed sucker, go away, I ain't playin' She was – she was – it's true She was cold; I was down, I ain't lyin' to you. That Bambi-shakin' rein-girl left me sad and blue But I promised myself I'd have her for my own Cuz it was Christmas Eve, and I was all alone Kris Kringle, that cat, was in a jam alright He didn't have his Ever-ready's ready that night He said, “Yo, homeboy, with your incandescent snoot I need your help to deliver this loot. I said, “Dang. For real? You got to be jivin'. You gonna hook me to the brunt of the ride that you be drivin'? He said, “Yo, I'm as serious as a heart attack I got a lot of little goodies in my Santa Claus sack. But the fog is so thick and so dark and so black I can't see my way there, much less get back.” Wha-wha-well, the next thing you know, I'm in front of the sleigh I say, “Yo, this is dope. We be on our way.” And the rest, as they say, is history. I got the Bambi-shakin' rein-girl next to me. She says, “Oh, Rudy...” I say, “Yo. Slide me some HOOF.”